The Other Side of the Operating Table

Tomorrow Pie will be having his operation to have his tonsils and adenoids removed. He is also having grommets inserted. I know that this is the right thing for him as he is deaf as a post. He also snores like a beast!

I am nervous, more nervous than I thought I would be. Mr Pud is doing the hospital bit. Not out of choice but someone has to stay with Pudding. She totally plays Mr Pud so she has to stay with me. Meanwhile I am sending my gorgeous boy off to the surgeons. I have been the nurse in these situations many times. But this is different. This is my child.

Operating Table

I know how the whole thing works.  How they will arrive and be greeted by a lovely nurse. Pie will meet his surgeon and have everything explained. Daddy will dress him in his hospital gown and together they will go down to the operating theatre.

I want to be there. I can’t. This is the joy of having two children and family to far away to help. I am his mother and he needs me.

So many times I have comforted parents. Steered them from the ward. Promised to call as soon as their baby is in recovery. Offered empty words or cups of tea. Held their hands. Given out hugs and tissues. Usually in circumstances much more serious than a tonsillectomy.

This time I am on the other side of the operating table. I don’t like it. It’s my baby, my boy who is at the mercy of someone else. I have no control over what happens. All the risks run through my head and crash over me like the tide. My rational brain is fighting with my emotional neurosis.

The boys are staying over night in the hospital. In a way this is good. Really all I want to do is scoop Pie up and tuck him in his own bed. I want to hold his hand and stroke his hair while he sleeps. Rock him in my arms like I haven’t done since he was a baby. Tell him Mummy loves him. Apologise that I couldn’t be there.


Being the other side of the operating table is hard. Harder than I ever imagined. My heart goes out to all the other parents whose children go through this. You are so brave. Braver than me. I can’t imagine what I would do if this was life saving heart surgery. Or one of several operations. I have been lucky to have a strong, healthy boy. I am sure he will bounce back like the trooper he is. But tonight? Tonight I will squeeze him a little tighter. Keep him up a little longer and read just one more story…


15 thoughts on “The Other Side of the Operating Table”

    1. It was one of the hardest things I have done. Thank you for kind message, virtual hugs gratefully received 🙂 xx

  1. It’s not something I’ve had to do but I imagine it is so so hard to leave them in someone else’s hands, even when you know that those are exactly the right hands! Hope all goes smoothly and that he’s right as rain in no time. Big hugs to you xxx #triballove

  2. Oh hun I know just how you feel. My boy had his tonsils out a few years ago when he turned 7. It was much better in the long run than the endless and exhausting bouts of tonsillitis. I hope he made a quick recovery. #triballove x

    1. The operation was pretty awaful – but the recovery is even worse! He is such an angry little chap at the moment. Hoping we will turn a corner soon x

  3. Ah, good luck mummy! Little one will be fine. I had mine out when I was younger, lots of ice cream and ribeana if I remember rightly.
    No experience of grommets. I’m sure presents will help the recovery!

    1. I thought he would be desperate for an ice lolly but apparently all he wants to eat are biscuits… strange child! Thanks for your lovely comment xx

  4. Sending you all masses of love – I’ve not had to do this, but I can imagine how hard it would be. Hope it all goes well, I’m sure Pie will be in the best hands xx #triballove

    1. thank you for your kind message – the day was tough but I think we are finally on the road to recovery x

  5. Sending you so much love today! I have no doubt that he will bounce back in no time and be demanding jelly and ice cream as soon as possible! I know that doesn’t help while he is actually in theatre though, so I just hope that the time flies very quickly!! Lucy xx

    1. I can’t believe how quickly he bounced back! I spent all the time worrying and 30 mins after his op he was sat up stuffing toast… The recovery since has been more of a struggle. Never seen such a grumpy boy! Thanks for your lovely comment x

  6. Oh I feel for you… And that very last line got me. I’m gulping back the tears now! Though I’m sure he will be absolutely fine… in fact reading the replied to the other comments, he was!! Popping over from #BISS

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